December 08, 2008

prayer

I'm very anxious. Was all along getting ready for this roller coaster ride...infact experienced the joys of post ride before the ride! It's like working backwards...now getting on to the ride...dont really want to think what, how, why...will handle things as they come (as a good ol vipz advised)

Carry me through this good Lord.

© Z.

November 25, 2008

Day 3-7 and Beyond

Oh yeah..I had to update about the remaining diet days…ummm…

Day 3 was bananas & milks & soup…so u can imagine how it went! Started with banana shake...and veg soup and then some more veg soup and bananas and then some milk. If anyone wants to know how a banana fed cow looks like, meet me.

Day 4 was all fruits & veg. Same old soup and same old fruits. I can sense their disdain when I reach out for them in the fridge.

Day 5 was chicken & tomatoes. NOW WE ARE TALKING!! I made some nice chicken stew. ZERO oil. This lasted me till tea time. Dinner was Minced chicken..yumm!

Day 6 was chicken & veggies. No chicken today as had no time to shop. Had the usual veggie fare.

Day 7 was rice & veggie & fruits. Had everything except the ones mentioned here.

So, Day 7 marked end of a uneventful diet program. The results? Well well…didn’t check!! Actually, didn’t bother to. But I have lost some inches and few of my old clothes which were on brink of being labeled as “Once worn, Cant Anymore” fit me now.

It was a nice diet plan actually...key learnings being lot of water, daily exercise (even if its for 10 mins) and no skipping breakfast.

But hey, didn’t momma already tell me this before I fooled around with diets?? Sigh. We’ll learn the hard way…we are like that only :D!

November 15, 2008

Day 2

All veggie day.

Starts with 2 boiled potatoes with a pat of butter (part of diet, before you wince!). Lunch was Subway veggie salad...some more of veggie salad in the eve.

I was feeling drowsy the whole day...infact, the morning began with a headache. As the clock ticked, I was getting more cranky and edgy. Towards the evening, went for a movie. Heehaahaaa..had a veggie sandwich & a tub of butter popcorn. And Pepsi. Day 2 ruined.

Sigh.


© Z.

Day 1

Day I of GM Diet is all fruits day, except bananas.

So the day begun with fruit salad...followed by apple..then guavas...then some chikoos...then pomegranate...and it was just 2 pm :(. Hunger pangs every 30 mins!

Had lots of water thru the day. Had to visit a batchmate's wedding in the eve. Well..err..had some spring rolls and paneer pakoras...but the dinner was a fruit plate.

Duh. It's so uncool, this diet.

© Z.

November 12, 2008

Day 0

There has been no mortal (the female kinds specially) who would not get charmed by the idea of losing weight without working out!

Latest victim is yours truly. The GM Diet begins tomorrow.


© Z.

November 01, 2008

Random Musings - whichever part

1. How can emotions rule finance?
2. How do you give unto someone, when you actually wanted her to give unto you?
3. How do you have your hands across something that's splitting from all sides?
4. How can time just fly when you were worried all day about how it will pass by?
5. Why do people want to control & micro manage?
6. What kind of people are control freaks?
7. How can you keep making promises to yourself and not honor them?
8. How can you be sure about your decision?
9. How do you provide solace to a upset heart thats given up on hope?
10. How can you make yourself do something that you just dont want to do?
11. Why would you want to do something that you dont want to do?
12. Why cant you not do what you dont want to do?
13. Why does it matter so much if it wasnt meant to be done?
14. What if it was meant to be, but you dont want to do it?
15. Back to Q # 10
16. Why is life so fucked up?
17. Do I have to round it off to 20 Qs?
18. What if I dont want to?
19. And who cares if I do or dont, anyways?


© Z.

October 18, 2008

Just another day at work.

It gets so increasingly frustrating. You have 100 people around with 10000 expectations. Add to these, you have 1000 more people who you are responsible for with 1000000 more. And if you dont live upto even 1 of them, its catastrophe. You have either changed or dont care or are irresponsible or simply the issue is escalated, if it can be.

I'm beginning to detest it now. Everywhere I turn, I have people expecting something out of me, with timelines attached!! Who do I turn to?? Is there a single person I can bank on to partner with me throughout this without having to keep knocking doors for help everytime? I understand the pressure and its not as if its something I've not dealt with before. But now...I'm losing all the interest & zeal to handle it. It all seems just so not worth it...

God, you are aware, arnt you? HELP ME. PLEASE.

© Z.

October 07, 2008

Maggi Maggi Maggi

Once you cross 25…you begin to count. Not just days & months as they etch by, but also those memories of 2.5 decades…which tend to grow more wooly, indistinct and far off if you don’t keep jogging your cells often.

During my brunch which consisted of Maggi noodles (and this despite several vows to eat healthy), my mind took a leafed through the History book...(my! I sound Neanderthal) to check on entries matching “Maggi+Noodles”. I think my first word did start with an “M”…no...not Mama/Mummy…yes...you got that right! I must’ve opened one eye…looked up at the crowd of curious adults staring down at me and bawled, “Maaaaaagggggggggggiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii” and NestlĂ©’s marketing director who was having his kid delivered in the next room must’ve quickly obliged.

Maggi was everywhere when I grew up…it was a prize for behaving well…it was the tool to pataofy me…it was there in the lunch box…during the dinners…during the brunch…and even when you weren’t hungry but really wanted to eat something. My school used to have this Maggi lunches wherein all of were provided free maggi! Unlimited! Slurrrpp!!

Over the years, so many flavors were introduced, taken back, re-introduced…masala, chicken, tomato, chatpata, curry, lemon, pulao, chowmein, veg atta, dal vegetable (yucks), hot & sour, etc (please add to the list if I missed any!)

I remember looking on anxiously as Mom would serve the noodles in different bowls. I HAD to get the max AND also the utensil in which it was cooked! I would happily lick it up post finishing my royal meal …LOL! Even today…it’s the best thing after sliced bread. Filling and nostalgic. Just add anything to it…cook it the way you like it…it tastes awesome!

And BTW, I could NEVER make it in 2 mins!

October 02, 2008

Eid Mubarak

Eid marks end of Ramadan...a month which teaches you the virtues of Will Power & Control. Control your temptations, desires & everything which you'd normally go overboard with ;).

God bless...we all need Him.

© Z.

September 25, 2008

Travel Journals

There's something about travels. After reading this by Vipul, I took a trip down the memory lane.

I aint someone who enjoys traveling. Or so I thought. It turned out to be one of the thousand things which I think I dont like and end up doing. Shows how warped my sense of my own liking & disliking is :). I discover that I dont like lengthy commuting...which am sure most of us dont.

Coming back to the point, there is something about traveling & journeys. I've been to just 3 places wherein we just backpacked and left. Agra, Mussorie & Manali. There's this suspended feeling...you know...you are in a place where nobody knows you...every moment is a discovery...you try to hold on your own when your being actually wants to get lost amidst the unknown crowds...you feel so...fulfilled. The feeling makes you realise there's so much more to life than office & home drudgery. It's been close to 6 months since my last travel...but I can still recall how I felt when I looked up into the skies and found snow capped hills, clouds bellowing, birds frolicking, the Sun dull and sense of serenity about the whole scene.

On one such trip to Mussorie, the highway was closed due to some reason and all cars had to take a bypass. This bypass went through a hamlet which had never seen such a caravan before. The roads(?) were bad, but the air in that village..musty...laid back...thatched roofs...hens & goats running around...people peeking out of windows...curious looks....it was 7 am...and yet the whole place looked like it could afford a slumber of couple of more hours. At such times, you just feel like standing still and soaking the whole atmosphere in. It helps you gain that "tehraav" in your self which is like a river....flowing full speed downstream...no controls...no checks.

Ummm....I like traveling :)...I could do with some more of such memories :). Ah...just one more wish if my God could fulfill....get me this! :)


© Z.

September 12, 2008

As it is

And so the day begins…total misalignment. Assuming today is Thursday, when it actually is Friday…I messed up couple of meetings. And what’s worse…I missed my Friday fast as well.

What’s going on?

September 10, 2008

Sigh.

Today…I reacted to a bad news in a very bad manner….I should learn to control my emotions.

August 23, 2008

Finally my own!!

Phew!! After much deliberation, procrastination, frustration & desperation I've designed my own blog template. Right from the background, header, dividers, font to spacing et al. YES!!!

Need to fix few issues in this one as well...dunno why it loads to the rightside before centrally aligning itself....any thoughts?

Edit:- Now my Almighty knows how many changes I've done to this blog to finally reach here. This look is better than the chocolate one. Very spacious...has a nice airy feel to it.

This stays.

Till I start getting those template change bouts again!!!

© Zarine.

August 14, 2008

Those 12 types

Now this post was long in the offing...but never stuck me to actually publish it.

Zodiac Analysis!

Yes! Am now gonna write down my experiences with each sun sign and if any of you belong to the "wrong" ones...HARD LUCK.

To begin with the ones I avoid with a barge pole.

Sagittarius
Aquarius
AND
Capricorn

While the first 2 are simply irritating bunch of people, I've not met a single Capricorn who hasnt hurt me.

Next in line...

Gemini
Aries

Geminis. Sigh. Who will tell them the planet revolves around the Sun NOT them?! Chatterbugs & Attention Hoggers. One of the most self centered signs. I cant fathom how can one go on & on about him/herself to such an extent. But yeah...you can count on them to cheer you up when you are in the dumps.

Aries. Hyper Active or Hyper Lazy. Their favt prayer is either "God grant me patience...and do it right NOW!" or "God grant me energy...can you do that tomorrow?" Not a bad bunch actually...shouldnt be clubbed with Geminis. After all, how dare someone share THEIR limelight!?

Virgo. Libra. The former is nice, gentlemanly & courteous. The latter is all this + flirtatious. Trust me. But you can trust the Virgos to take care of the family...and Librans to help create one ;)! And boy o boy...I havnt met a single Libran without a gorgeous pair of lips on them. God's equipped them well...not their fault ;)

Taurus. Again all Taurus guys I've met have been good looking. And I havnt met many ;).

Scorpio. Deadly. They deserve to be the King of Zodiacs. Truly talented & drop dead looks. Sharp & agile. And vengeful. The Achievers variety.

Pisces. Wow. They should be the Fairy Mother of all Zodiacs. Nice, warm, loving, little dumb, innocent folks. I can count on them. Even in the dead of the night. Extremely dependable. But thode phattu hoten hain. If they could only work on that timid nerve of theirs.

Cancer. The best for the last. If Scorpion should be the King, welcome the Queen. You'll find cancerians either bagging gold medals or in the jail. Extreme personalities. Love home. Hate traveling. And end up doing whatever they hate. Arrogant to the extent that you'd compare them with a Gemini (O Gosh!). Hard exterior/soft core bullshit. Vain at times. But beautiful people. Again, havnt met a single cancerian who doesnt have the looks. Let's close here...If I start on this sign...I'll take some time to end. Coz I have experienced it first hand, being a Cancerian myself.

Std Disclaimer :- Ofcourse the ones you know are different from what's described here. Live with it.


© Zarine.

August 11, 2008

Have had enough!

Am so fed up of changing my blog skins everytime!! Something or the other messes up the old one and I have to go shopping again!

vipul...pls help me tweak this one :(((

© Zarine.

July 29, 2008

Of Ghosts & Dogs.

It's been a while. Things havnt changed much between the last post & this one. Except that I find myself a bit more confident these days. Owe it to the promotion & a direct reportee or owe it to the fact that you've seen enough to know that things just happen. The world doesnt crash if you dont meet the deadlines. Hasnt yet, ever.

Not really a retrospective post this, but more of an observation kinds. Observation fed by thoughts of near & dear ones.

"You should often do what you fear the most. This way death of fear is certain" - Mark Twain

How do we define our fears? By the consequences? I'm actually scared of ghosts. And dogs. But I still remember all those nights when there was no power & my mind made things just more difficult. It would be difficult to sleep as I'd be on high alert. Now, why do I fear ghosts? Coz I have no control over them and I cant possibly combat them either. That's the problem. If I knew that on sighting a ghost you should make a face & its gone...it would've made life easier. I already give in to its fear before even facing one!!

And dogs?? I detest them. If I find even 1 looking in my direction, my heartbeat starts racing. But I still remember the day when one dog actually chased me. I ran...scared...and suddenly when I knew it would out run me, I turned around to face it. I dunno what got into me to make me think that my fist, if it lands right on its nose, should help me!! But I turned and almost started snarling at that beast when it changed its course and went away. I stood there, breathless. Not that this incident made me overcome the fear...I still feel scared of them. But now I know I'll fight back if that damned beast ever acts smart.

The point being, we cannot overcome our fears until we face them. Or even after we face them. No matter what, trust on oneself is mandatory to survive. The biggest demon lies within us. Kill it, if you have to.



© Zarine.

July 11, 2008

M&A

Merged my new one with the old one...yooohooo!!!!!!!!!

© Zarine.

July 05, 2008

Just Me.

At those lonely hours of a cold night you wonder...how much have you invested in yourself to keep your being afloat at such times?

Do you have any habit or hobby you can fall back on to see yourself through such still hours? You fall back on your friends without for once thinking that they too have their lives & cant be there every time you need them. Do you even 'need' them now or are you are using them as a defense against Loneliness? Are you curing the problem or its symptoms? Thank Lord for the pals you have...who lift you through...what if for once they couldnt? Would you fall flat?

You can sit still for hours when you are alone...its like something is lost. You exist in them...in people around you. Their presence revives you...you are a low key raaga without them. You are so completely detached from your surroundings that it sometimes startles me that you are even present in the room! It seems like you really arnt here...you are somewhere else...mebbe with all those people who arnt near you at that point...

Or we could be misinterpreting the whole thing. It could be that you are so at peace with yourself....like a still lake...an inert body comfortable with its state...that you dont feel the need to engage yourself by indulging in any activity. You draw into your shell, you typical Cancerian.

Whichever way it is, I still love you.

God bless.


© Zarine.

July 01, 2008

Catchin up

Phew..the days jus run..no, whiz by these days. In between the 2 posts...my birthday came & went, a promotion happened, 5 terminations and endless hours of employee counsellings. As always, loads to write but no time to string it all and stitch it here! I like the sudden rush....but hope things turn sane soon.

© Zarine.

June 04, 2008

Do Distances matter?

There’s this friend of mine who I met over the Net. I still rem’ber his first line…it was “How shameless can you be?” And the topic in question was my making blind guesses in the Quant section in CAT 2003. I don’t rem’ber my reply though…I jus recall I was a lil taken aback!

It’s been 4 years now. We’ve met thrice. But he was always there when I needed him. I hope it was vice versa as well. We talk like 2, max 3 times in a month since we got working. Imagine meeting someone who’s so close just 3 times out of the 1400 days that you know each other. And actually, if you add up the time we spent with each other on these 3 days, it’ll add up to just a day!!

He’s someone I’m proud of. He reinstates my belief about relations being all about minds connecting & staying in touch.

Distances…they come in between if you let them.

May 29, 2008

Pa(i)nting!

Umm...ho hummmm....mmmmmm...errrr....aaahhhhhh...eeeemmmmm....OK DAMN here it is :- I've resumed painting after more than 10 years and am shit scared coz I dunno if i rem'ber anything abt it and I did try today and I'm still little naive about the whole thing and am ok with the pencils and not so ok with the sketches and have managed to do a decent job with the water colors and the more I try to improvise them the worse they get so I decided to just let them be and the rate at which am using my water colors, am gonna run out of them in a month's time!!

That was the longest sentence of my life. *RUNS*

© Zarine.

May 16, 2008

Tere Liye

I was listening to this Veer Zaara song "Tere Liye" and suddenly recalled how I bawled uncontrollably in the theater! I mean, I was us fine till the scene before that...and as soon Preity walks in & the music begins, tears roll down! That moment when they face each other after 22 yrs...man....I couldnt control myself! Imagine....here you are...your life ruined & everything lost...and you still carry on just because of the one person who you love so much....you give up on your life just to withhold that person's dream/dignity...when you pretty well know you can never get him...when you have given up hope of ever seeing him again...and there he is! The person who you revered in your thoughts for more than 2 decades, standing before you. In the same deplorable condition as you were, for the same 22yrs. For the same reason as yours. For the same love.

Bawl!!!!!!!!!! Am gonna cry again!!!!!!!!!!!


© Zarine.

In all His Glory.

God is such a personal aspect of one's life. We come across so many people citing how God should be worshiped, how your relation with Him should be and the usual Do's & Dont's. There might be times when you dont relate to what's been preached, but you are apprised that you do not know since it requires an understanding at a higher level or that people with more insight & knowledge say its right...and hence it should be right.

So there you are...confused. Should you go by what your nubile mind thinks or what a more knowledgeable mind preaches. You might tread the latter path for the fear of doing something wrong in your ignorance. But even if you still do something 'wrong' due to your ignorance in your quest of understanding God, does the Almighty view it so severely? I dont understand the "God-fearing" funda. Can you love & accept someone wholeheartedly if you feared Him? There's always this barrier of fear. The constant act of getting approvals & acceptance...of doing the right thing lest you invite His Wrath.

A colleague related the God-Man relation as that of a Mother-child one. Mother creates the kid, brings him up with all love, tells him what's right & what's wrong. Now if the kid doesnt do as the Mother has taught him, she gets upset & punishes him. She's punishing the kid for his own good, but the kid, in his limited sensibilities, does not understand this. For him, mom is 'bad'.

Fair. My question is, which life is worthy of the two....the one where the kid does as the mom says & obeys all rules & doesnt do any bad stuff OR the one where the mom informs the kid of the basic rules of life & just lets him discover life on his own. Where the kid doesnt swing at all fearing that he will swing too high & fall OR Where the kid knows he will fall if he swings too high & controls his speed accordingly.

I know, in my limited sensibilities, what's right & what's isnt for me. I might be completely off the mark, for all I know. But how will I know until I test it out? I hope the choice isnt between trusting God or trusting myself. It should rather be about me trusting myself & knowing God is there incase I falter. Trusting Him to take care of me when I cant. Trusting the fact that God will watch over me when am fooling around in my ignorance....and leading me to wisdom.

He has to be with me. He has created me. I'm His responsibility.

That doesnt imply am shaking off the responsibility of my actions. But it implies, as I accept Him in every situation of Life...without questioning Him, He too must accept me in whatever I do. My God cant be conditional in His love. I cant keep thinking how I can please Him and gain His approval...I'd rather spend that time in doing things I know are right. Let Him decide if its actually so or not. I know I'll have to bear the result of my actions, but even then I'd trust Him to be besides me.

It troubles me no end when people project God as a score keeper. Score of all your good & bad deeds & rewarding/punishing you accordingly. God's gotta be much more Magnificent than that. God has to be the Hope. He has to be the Love & Peace one needs so badly at times. God has to be the reassuring Voice which states all will be fine again. He has to be the Voice which guides you. The one which warns you of impending dangers. God has to be within you. He cant possibly be anywhere else. My God cant be anywhere else.


© Zarine.

May 06, 2008

Aah!


Damn, letting go can be tough. But it's an exhilarating feeling once you that. Am letting go of my life...stop being a control freak. There's no point losing your cool over something you have no control over. On the ones you do, why lose control when you can mend it right?

Dont control...other reactions, their expectations, the outcomes, their thoughts, your fears, your heart, your mind & "the-way-it-should-be"s. And voila! You'll discover how much you've been missing in life!

And a parting line from one of favt songs :-

When you want it the most there's no easy way out
When you're ready to go and your heart's left in doubt
Don't give up on your faith
Love comes to those who believe it
And that's the way it is

And this is for my best buddy :-

I can read your mind and I know your story

and I see what you're going through yeah
It's an uphill climb, and I'm feeling sorry
But I know it will come to you yeah

When life is empty with no tomorrow
And loneliness starts to call
Baby don't worry, forget your sorrow
'Cause love's gonna conquer it all, ALL!

And I'll always love you.

© Zarine.

April 25, 2008

Giving myself a chance - II

How do you get started when you are nervous? How do you get yourself to believe that you can do it…and that it doesn’t matter if others are grimacing?

It amazes me how much it matters…the perception you make on others. How they look at you, how they think about you? Do you ‘qualify’? Are you good enough? Will this impress them or will they accept me if I did this? Does my acceptance of self depend on theirs of me? (What English is that??)

Whatever, my wondering sessions will never cease!

I made a stunning discovery about myself last night, stunning being an understatement. It was this constant wondering about why I wasn’t reciprocating to something; let’s call it “Activity”. This Activity was on my list for more than a year and I simply couldn’t get down to doing it. I discussed about this with my guy and he did his best to support me…but, eventually he faced the fact too that I was simply not responsive to it. Infact, last evening was one of those days when I tried to draw up a schedule(yet again) & get myself enrolled…basically, get someone who can make me do it. But..no…it fell on its face…FLAT. As always.

Now, I’m someone who knows what I’m doing & why I’m doing it. Everything I did had an answer/reason/objective/motive behind it & am cognizant of the same. But I simply couldn’t figure out what was stopping me from doing this Activity. I thought…and boom it stuck me. And that strike completely bowled me over. I was lost, for God knows how many minutes…my mind went numb…or went into an overdrive…I dunno..it tried analyzing the reason that was thrown up…and it couldn’t agree less! For almost 26 goddamn years, I was living with a thought I didn’t know existed! And now that I know it…it still as difficult to digest.

While the revelation is intensely personal, it suffices to say that it has changed the way I look at myself now. Am still groping with this new feeling…However, this has changed things & I’ve made my first attempt at the Activity. Inshallah, I intend to see it through this time.

And I need to change the blog template. It’s stupid.

Giving myself a chance

Starting on a brand new day. Learning how to fall in love with myself….for the first time ever….it’s tougher, as I know my failings…but am gonna sincerely try.

April 15, 2008

Do saal

In another week, I’ll compete 2 years of my ‘professional life’. Ah! 2 saal. Those first 3-4 months…I remember them so vividly. Eager & hungry. Full of energy & promise. Smiling at everyone….bright new mornings…chirpy self…enquiring mind & observing eyes.

2 years….what has changed? Definitely have subdued down…don’t jump the gun anymore…take more informed & calculated decisions…don’t fret & fume over escalations…can handle pressure better now…know who to smile at…know what to ask & to whom…can manage time better…and most importantly…know where I’m headed now.

Net net..it’s been a good 2 yrs…with a fair share of ups & downs…and I’m loving it! Yakkkuuuu!!!!

April 07, 2008

Mwwaahhhaaahahahaha

A new template! YOOHOO!

March 29, 2008

Life Matters.

What or who matters in life? Does life itself matter? Can one just live through it as if in a hazy dream? Or a hazy nightmare?

I so often catch myself wondering what's the purpose of living? Why do we live? No, it's not one of those "purpose of life" discussions wherein you try to figure your mission on this planet. It's a one wherein am questioning the need for life on the planet itself.

There has to be more to it than a mere creation of God, sent on this planet as a punishment for Adam & Eve's deeds. There has to be more than just Good vs Bad, more than Us vs Them. Did God create us to check how we combat temptations? Is that all? How we respond to crisis & how we uphold our integrity? All this....this suffering...this violence...the joys...the happiness....the manipulations...the honesty...the whole hog...all to test the being? For what? And why?

Family ties, friendship, enmity, betrayal, tears, sacrifices, testimonies...for what?

Is the fear of God & His Anger the deciding factor of one's action? Do you do good to please Him? Or do you do good because the situation warrants it & that's the right thing to do? When you do wrong or are unfair, what do you fear the most? God's punishment or the wrath of a lost hope?

How much does the human being matter to you? If God's within each one of us, arnt we repeatedly killing Him when we thoughtlessly hurt people around us?

When you are at a crossroad of breaking someone's trust, do you go ahead? How easily? And if it involves a choice between trust of 2 parties and one has to be broken to honor the other, how do you decide? Do you do a cost benefit analysis to find where the least damage is? It's still betrayal at the end of the day.

That brings me back to the question. Is this what Life is all about? How you carry yourself through it...how many friends & foes you make by the end of it? Or how famous you were?

I guess, for me....Life's all about a Heart. Not how many you have won, rather how many you could've chosen to break....but didn't.


© Zarine.

March 23, 2008

The clock's ticking.

I took a stress test today. The results were "Stressed Out. You may need help." Now before that Heart Attack pays me a visit, I must turn to someone I really love & ask him to bail me out.

© Zarine.

Agdam Bagdam

I didn't know cornflakes with Badam milk & some oranges tastes so good.

Man, am all over the place these days. My speech is incoherent...I think faster than I speak which results in some garbled speech! After 2yrs of working, am off late feeling like a new joinee! Am so anxious all the time. The past 6 months have exhausted me completely. So much so that am looking forward to the one new member joining my team. Am gonna dump everything on that poor lad/lass & RUN!

But what is it exactly?? I need a review. Yes, that's what I need. It'll give me some perspective on the last 6 months. I need to recharge & rejuvenate myself. I need to go to Kerala.

See? see see see? One minute I need a review, next minute I need Kerala!!

Sannnyaaassss!!!!!!

© Zarine.

March 15, 2008

Incomple..


© Zarine.

February 23, 2008

--

Am REALLY Bored.

© Zarine.

February 18, 2008

Gussssaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Bloody helll!! Sometimes it gets just so damn difficult!! You’d want someone you can shout at and bully coz there has to be some outlet to the anger simmering inside you!!!! That also shows how mentally instable you are! And how you’d want to feed your ego by doing all this. Wont help ya, kid. Trust me, it’ll only get more pathetic.

And keechad se dur raho agar apne haath saaf rakhna ho to.

February 01, 2008

Cheers!

Time to celebrate!!

In the past few weeks…I was so bogged down by work that my morale took a hit. A nice hit, at that. Work work work. But as things go, one has to keep working and slogging. Then popped my Super boss. He wanted me to design the career path program for one of overseas operations. Okay….and what inputs do I have about their profiles?…Not much....Okay…Can I have a look at their performance management system to design the criteria?....No, there isn’t any in the first place….Okay…Any Ops plan to figure the Org development chart?...Nopes….Cool…How long do I have design this ‘career path’?....3 hours….Fantastic….Atleast let me know what these people are supposed to do post promotions, so that I can design a competency map???....That’s available!...Thank Great God…Life’s not that unfair, after all!

So basis the ‘inputs’, I design a career path…not just 1 level but a level above that as well. Mail it to him. He mails it to his Boss…she shoots it down with 3 questions…he braves it and answers them…he had the answers…after all the program was fool proof ;)…okay…the good news is…it’s gonna be implemented…in the chaos…I stand still for a moment…pat my back for the good work…feel realllllyyyyyyyy good…and move on…

Sigh…such is life….celebrations are short lived…disasters are soon forgotten…life moves on….

January 21, 2008

Yaawwnnnn Monday morns!!

Man, I’m bored…and how bored I am!!! Monday morning…first time in the last 4 months when I didn’t feel like coming for work. Add to the fact that it’s an off for Operations…it makes the whole thing more dreary. I was wondering if I can go back home by 5?

Wah…I’m even looking low! “Monday is the key point…Monday agar nikal jaaye, toh no problem” chirps my VP - Training. Ma’am…problem Monday ki hi hai! L

It’s been one of those weekends who’s after effects are felt in the upcoming weekdays. I bought a new cell, btw. There’s a no-cam phone drive on in my biz unit, and as always…HR has to be the first one to comply.

Jeez…I feel so dead this morning. Let’s listen to Radio…

1. 92.7 - Delhi Fry..a cookery show with some Suruchi…nah..next..

2. 91.1 - Some ad going on a girl “Who’s a naukrani but wants to become uske khawabon ke raja ki rani…watch “Raja ki aayegi baaraat” on Zee”.

3. 98.3 - Nominations for “Femina Miss India” on…logon to feminamissindia.indiatimes.com for more details.

4. 104.8 - Ladkiyon ko sasural se kitna attached hona chahiye.

5. 104 - “Maa” song from TZP. Hmm…some music finally.

Chalo…life looks a lil bright with some mujik.