November 09, 2006

Losing in relationships

How important is it?

When we meet someone who we like and would love to be associated with, we often greet the person with open arms in our lives. We realise the person's importance over a period when we spend time/moments/secrets/dreams with them. And one fine day, we find the person gone.

Lets not talk about a natural separation called Death, we cant do anything about it. It's about those separations which we knowingly/unknowingly bring into a relation.

Some people cant stand others getting too close to them. They start behaving in a wierd manner and try to create distances. Some people want the ones who are close to be more closer...classic eg:- Best friends marrying each other. What about those who fall in neither category?

These folks usually dunno how to handle it. They get edgy when someone gets too close...and they move away...and when the drift starts, they get uneasy and try to hold on, thus creating a mess outta the relation. Why cant we decide who we want to be close with in our lives? Why is there so much doubt and suspicion when it comes to trusting our lives to someone?

I have freely trusted many folks. And now most of them dont even figure in my "Say 'Hi' atleast." list. They hurt me, let me down, but all that's part of the game. I have also found some gems who I can blindly depend on. It's a tradeoff.

But you know who's the worse of the lot? Those who care but cant show. Those who dont have the guts to live upto the relation. Those who would confess, only if cornered. Those who are more scared of what x/y/z would think if they admitted the truth. Those who cant decide what's more important :- the other person or the World. They would suffocate themselves and the other person too. No wonder they end up losing that person. And rightly so.

But lose everyone should. Atleast for a moment, if not for a month. Atleast for a second, if not for a season. Atleast for a fortnight, if not forever. Lest that happens, you'd never how life would be without that precious person. And you'd never know how incomplete you could be...

© Zarine.