Losing in relationships
How important is it?
When we meet someone who we like and would love to be associated with, we often greet the person with open arms in our lives. We realise the person's importance over a period when we spend time/moments/secrets/dreams with them. And one fine day, we find the person gone.
Lets not talk about a natural separation called Death, we cant do anything about it. It's about those separations which we knowingly/unknowingly bring into a relation.
Some people cant stand others getting too close to them. They start behaving in a wierd manner and try to create distances. Some people want the ones who are close to be more closer...classic eg:- Best friends marrying each other. What about those who fall in neither category?
These folks usually dunno how to handle it. They get edgy when someone gets too close...and they move away...and when the drift starts, they get uneasy and try to hold on, thus creating a mess outta the relation. Why cant we decide who we want to be close with in our lives? Why is there so much doubt and suspicion when it comes to trusting our lives to someone?
I have freely trusted many folks. And now most of them dont even figure in my "Say 'Hi' atleast." list. They hurt me, let me down, but all that's part of the game. I have also found some gems who I can blindly depend on. It's a tradeoff.
But you know who's the worse of the lot? Those who care but cant show. Those who dont have the guts to live upto the relation. Those who would confess, only if cornered. Those who are more scared of what x/y/z would think if they admitted the truth. Those who cant decide what's more important :- the other person or the World. They would suffocate themselves and the other person too. No wonder they end up losing that person. And rightly so.
But lose everyone should. Atleast for a moment, if not for a month. Atleast for a second, if not for a season. Atleast for a fortnight, if not forever. Lest that happens, you'd never how life would be without that precious person. And you'd never know how incomplete you could be...
© Zarine.
When we meet someone who we like and would love to be associated with, we often greet the person with open arms in our lives. We realise the person's importance over a period when we spend time/moments/secrets/dreams with them. And one fine day, we find the person gone.
Lets not talk about a natural separation called Death, we cant do anything about it. It's about those separations which we knowingly/unknowingly bring into a relation.
Some people cant stand others getting too close to them. They start behaving in a wierd manner and try to create distances. Some people want the ones who are close to be more closer...classic eg:- Best friends marrying each other. What about those who fall in neither category?
These folks usually dunno how to handle it. They get edgy when someone gets too close...and they move away...and when the drift starts, they get uneasy and try to hold on, thus creating a mess outta the relation. Why cant we decide who we want to be close with in our lives? Why is there so much doubt and suspicion when it comes to trusting our lives to someone?
I have freely trusted many folks. And now most of them dont even figure in my "Say 'Hi' atleast." list. They hurt me, let me down, but all that's part of the game. I have also found some gems who I can blindly depend on. It's a tradeoff.
But you know who's the worse of the lot? Those who care but cant show. Those who dont have the guts to live upto the relation. Those who would confess, only if cornered. Those who are more scared of what x/y/z would think if they admitted the truth. Those who cant decide what's more important :- the other person or the World. They would suffocate themselves and the other person too. No wonder they end up losing that person. And rightly so.
But lose everyone should. Atleast for a moment, if not for a month. Atleast for a second, if not for a season. Atleast for a fortnight, if not forever. Lest that happens, you'd never how life would be without that precious person. And you'd never know how incomplete you could be...
© Zarine.
Comments
I never try to get close to people as I am afraid of losing them some where in the future.
But the people who are already close to me.. like my parents, I try my best to be even more closer to me. They are the ones who I am really attached too and can't see myself in this world without them.
Life plays alot of tricks on you. You meet new people.. some of them end up playing very important roles in your life. And then the next thing you know, they are out of your life again..
Therefore we need to learn how to move on.. and most importantly, not to become so attached to someone. Try to keep distance without letting the other person know.
And hey.. nice to see you back after a long time :)
bt, as somebody has rightly said
relationships are not something that are born in the morning and die in the evening; they are born when u dont need them or are not bothered and die when you require them the most.
the above quote might not hold true in every situation. life is not mathematics and we cant make certain logical rules. but the quote says a lot about the uncertainties of relationships.
i hv learnt the hard way... (may not fit every one)... take things as they come... relationships are born ... they die (not the natural death)... actually we only mess up... unknowingly... infact now i have refuese my self to get into a relationship... (may be the fear) ... there are few who still a part of my life... but with no strings attached now... letting loose ... and moving on...
Are you attending the citehr meet on the 10th of December. Hope to cee u there
SK
why r u not writing now days ?
its long due..