For no reason.

Hi.Am down. For a very personal and strange reason. For a reason that none is to blamed. For a reason that it was none’s fault. For a reason that Life sucks. For a reason that whenever I choose to be close to what I like…Life smirks at me. For a reason that I can never get to do what I really want to do. For a reason when my heart wants to speak out and reach out to someone, I face a vacuum. For a reason that I am alone when I want to celebrate an occasion with someone I want to… For a reason that Life has decided that I stay the Loner that I am. For the reason that every happiness I want is delayed. For a reason that I don’t feel the happiness when it actually happens. For a reason that the fire within me is dead by the time its time comes. For a reason that reaffirms my faith in the thing that what I really love and hold dear shall always stay away from me. For a reason that those who love me have to be kept at a distance, ‘coz I cant get them close. For the reason that when I want to get them close, I have to distance away from that which is precious and already close to me. For a reason that Zarine shall always long in her life. For a reason that Zarine doesn’t celebrate her success. For a reason that Zarine isn’t surprised when she fails. For a reason that Zarine sleeps alone and lonely. For a reason that Zarine cries by herself. For a reason that Zarine is looked upon to be strong…for she is her only anchor. For the reason that what she anchors on itself is dependant on her. For occasions like this when the kid within is hurt. For the fact that it gives up on Hope. For the reason that everytime it hoped from deep within, the hope died infront of its eyes. For the fact that Life gave her a life of ‘penny wise, pound foolish’.For she gets small stuff but is denied everything big. For the fact that none expects her to crib. For the reason that she doesn’t know if she should expect anything from anyone at all. For a small hope that gets killed in one shot. For none’s fault. For the fact that she hopes people read this and feel sorry for her. Worry about her. And she’d fool them into believing that everything’s alright and she’s a strong gal. Yet again. For she can never accept the fact that she can be hurt too…none can…For the reason that I dunno why something so private needs to be posted. For the reason that I hope it reaches out to someone who’d save me from myself. For the reason that I’d let someone like this enter my life. For the reason that I wont let anyone come tht close to me. For the reason that I choose to be the Loner that Life wants me to be.

For a joke called Life. For a puppet called Zarine. For a Hand called God.


© Zarine.